31.08.05

*Update* In an official letter to the American Chamber of Commerce in Russia (AmCham), the Director of the Russian Federal Migration Service (FMS) has indicated that these new tests will be part of the standard work permit requirements for the foreseeable future. This letter is available in an official translation provided by AmCham in PDF format.

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Half of the tests, at least, were not as painful as I thought they would be.  While I had heard that occasionally test results procured from western clinics were accepted by OVIR, I elected to strictly follow protocol and brave the soviet-style clinics the new visa regulations say must be used in order to receive a work visa for Russia. 

For the sake of brevity and efficiency, I will break this article into two parts.  The first addresses how and where to receive the tests.  The second offers some small commentary on the process itself. 

I.  How and Where to Get Your Tests

Leprosy, syphilis, chlamydia, chancres and AIDS can all be tested for at one state facility, the KVD.  The KVD stands for, in Russian, "Dermatological and Venereal Clinic."  They are part of Russia’s national health care system.  I chose to use KVD 9, located at Bolshaya Gruzinskaya Street, 9.  It’s conveniently located near the metro station Krasnopresnenskaya.  From the metro, cross the street and pass the zoo to your left.  After about five minutes walk, the clinic will be on your left, the entrance at the back.  At this location, you’ll need to go to office #8 and ask for the tests.  Bring your passport and 901 RU.  You’ll come back to this same location two days later to pick up your tests, which you can do by simply showing your passport again at the same office.  Total time spent (from my office near metro Tulskaya): 4.1 hours. 

For the tuberculosis test, one must go to a PTD station.  These clinics, also part of Russia’s national health care system are special clinics which test for and combat against specifically tuberculosis.  I chose PTD 5, located at 25 Rechnikov Street.  Exit metro Kolomenskaya from the exit located near the first car of the train from the center. In the perekhod take a left, then a right at the end of the tunnel. This will place in front of the movie theatre "Orbit." Take bus 670 to the bus stop "Dispenser."  The clinic is located across the street, behind the white enclosure.  Once here, check in at the desk and go to office #28.  The process after this is complicated, but they supply you with a guide.  Bring your passport and the full address of your registered residence; no money is needed yet.  You will pick up your test results here two to three days later by bringing your passport and receipts from Sberbank saying that you have paid the 768 RU charge at the bank.   Total time spent (from my office near metro Tulskaya, including an additional trip to Sberbank and getting lost due to an incorrect address): 6.2 hours. 

II.  Brief Commentary

The blood work I had done at KVD 9 was not unpleasant.  The doctors and even security guard were quite friendly and efficient.  However, though I have no education in the field, I can only describe their methods as suspect.  They used a sterilized (though I doubt new) needle to pump my blood directly into open test tubes.  These tubes were capped and placed unmarked on a rack next to several others.  When I went to receive my results, I was given a pre-filled form from a stack; the doctor just signed and handed it to me, making a mark in the book that contained no new information. I suspect from this that perhaps no actual test was done, but that doctors simply assumed that I, coming from 21st century America, likely do not have leprosy, syphilis, or chancres (as logic would serve). 

The tests for tuberculosis were far more irritating.  First, there are no PTD stations inside the circle line and also none convenient to a metro.  Although there are busses, I would assume that if a patient can make it to a PTD station by his/herself, the patient most certainly does not have a serious respiratory disease.  If you go to PTD 5, be careful that the address still listed on most official correspondence and on most maps (Kolomenskaya, 8/25) does not actually exist. Use the address I list above, it is the one stamped on the side of the building and the one people on the street can direct you to.  The tests begin with questions about your medical history, so you might want to review the Russian for "urine" and "radiation test."  The process is spread around four offices (28, 3, 11, 8), and you will lose blood and urine and be subjected to radiation along the way.   Also, beware that the folks within these offices apparently take frequent breaks and take lunch at different times; I spent an hour and a half just waiting for someone to simply come and open the offices I needed.  I could go on and on about the reasons I would never want to return to PTD 5. 

To provide this all with a somewhat happy ending, I’m still greatly amused by telling this story to other foreigners and hearing: "You got tested for WHAT?"  Perhaps most happily, hopefully, this article will soon be outdated as AmCham challenges these new requirements.